Idea
FALLING. Falling when going backwards into a crab. Falling when losing control of you body. The sensation of falling. A fear of falling. Falling to the floor. Mimicked falling. Genuine falling. Controlled falling. A broken down fall. A fall which is broken.
Aim
I want to see how far I can push myself. So far in this process I have been examining how much strain my body can endure. Throughout all my experimentation I have focused on these strains as physical manifestations in the form of 'stress positions' and literal falling over, and how much of this bodily excursion I can endure before (or in some cases actually) hurting myself and harming my muscles. I think this is because when hearing the phrase "push yourself" I tend to associate that with the physical excursion of say, an athlete, and so consequently everything I have produced so far has been limited to the exploration of my visible body. But in doing so I realised that I have (and potentially consciously) neglected to explore my fear of falling. For myself personally, it would be more of a challenge to mentally allow myself to fall into a bridge, than to physically hold myself there. My experiment for this workshop is no less literal- I will still be moving and enduring stress positions- however I want to do so in ways that focus on the journey my mind goes on when committing to these stress positions, with a key focus on how far I can push it beyond its traditional capabilities, or at least what I believe in my mind I am capable of.
Activities
Repeatedly attempt getting into the stress position CRAB, from standing, by bending backwards, with and without assistance from both other people and props.
Materials
My body, a wooden floor, a bed with a mattress, a chair, assistants.
Timing
Maintain this activity over the course of 2 hours until either I have completed the challenge, or my body has exhausted itself. This of course may occur before my mind is exhausted and vice versa.
Documentation
http://youtu.be/ifiln487824
Reflection and evaluation
I did not realise how genuinely scared I was of falling backwards into a bridge and hurting my neck. I have a fear of losing control and banging my head off of the floor or breaking my neck which is pretty much irrational, but it restricted my capabilities massively. I successfully got into a bridge backwards with the assistance of Sian and Aura, but only managed this once and it was not being documented at the time. I was however determined to succeed repeatedly and by myself, so decided to continue my attempts but at home with the use of my bed which acts as a safety mat. I find it interesting to note at this point that my seizures would generally always happen in my bed, and it would be out of my bed that I was afraid of falling. Therefore I find it funny that I am now returning to it in order to practice falling and within what I assume is my comfort zone.
FALLING. Falling when going backwards into a crab. Falling when losing control of you body. The sensation of falling. A fear of falling. Falling to the floor. Mimicked falling. Genuine falling. Controlled falling. A broken down fall. A fall which is broken.
Aim
I want to see how far I can push myself. So far in this process I have been examining how much strain my body can endure. Throughout all my experimentation I have focused on these strains as physical manifestations in the form of 'stress positions' and literal falling over, and how much of this bodily excursion I can endure before (or in some cases actually) hurting myself and harming my muscles. I think this is because when hearing the phrase "push yourself" I tend to associate that with the physical excursion of say, an athlete, and so consequently everything I have produced so far has been limited to the exploration of my visible body. But in doing so I realised that I have (and potentially consciously) neglected to explore my fear of falling. For myself personally, it would be more of a challenge to mentally allow myself to fall into a bridge, than to physically hold myself there. My experiment for this workshop is no less literal- I will still be moving and enduring stress positions- however I want to do so in ways that focus on the journey my mind goes on when committing to these stress positions, with a key focus on how far I can push it beyond its traditional capabilities, or at least what I believe in my mind I am capable of.
Activities
Repeatedly attempt getting into the stress position CRAB, from standing, by bending backwards, with and without assistance from both other people and props.
Materials
My body, a wooden floor, a bed with a mattress, a chair, assistants.
Timing
Maintain this activity over the course of 2 hours until either I have completed the challenge, or my body has exhausted itself. This of course may occur before my mind is exhausted and vice versa.
Documentation
http://youtu.be/ifiln487824
Reflection and evaluation
I did not realise how genuinely scared I was of falling backwards into a bridge and hurting my neck. I have a fear of losing control and banging my head off of the floor or breaking my neck which is pretty much irrational, but it restricted my capabilities massively. I successfully got into a bridge backwards with the assistance of Sian and Aura, but only managed this once and it was not being documented at the time. I was however determined to succeed repeatedly and by myself, so decided to continue my attempts but at home with the use of my bed which acts as a safety mat. I find it interesting to note at this point that my seizures would generally always happen in my bed, and it would be out of my bed that I was afraid of falling. Therefore I find it funny that I am now returning to it in order to practice falling and within what I assume is my comfort zone.